Gas Food Poisoning

Woke up yesterday morning and was soon bent over in a foetal position with a few theories running through our head:

1) Gastric attack.
Egads the PAIN. Only, the pain is not at stomach level but somewhere in the intestines. Yet we haven't started feeling like letting loose hell from the bowels.

2) Food poisoning.
Only at the time nothing felt like coming out urgently.

3) The mamak left a piece of blade in our roti kosong banjir.
Because that was how our stomach felt like. And now the blade was cutting up our insides as it made its slow progress to our bowels.

Course, the first course of action was to get going to the porcelain throne and see if anything was gonna come out. There were results but pain still persisted. Hence there goes theory one, since there were results, and also theory three, since there was no blood.

That left us with number two...no pun intended.

So there was the purging, the pain, the trip to the clinic once we felt better (and secure enough to visit the clinic without needing to stop by any Janvier-approved toilets), the sleeping on the couch while waiting our turn, the getting of medicine and the more-important medical chit and receipt, the getting home to gulp in meds and sleep...the usual routine one would take for these occasions.

Once home, medicated, showered and back into bed to rest from the morning's ordeal, we logged on Facebook via our iTouch and left the following status:
"Janvier...gas food poisoning."

Trust the iTouch's predictive keyboard to dramatize our situation at the expense of grammar.

Still, one thing we did notice was that we've gone from being in our third trimester to our usual svelt self once more as a result of the food poisoning. Something good after all, although we don't think we'll treat it as a regular solution to putting on weight.